This Is Why I'm Like This: Pin Hole Gum Surgery, A Summary

 11 August 2019
  Four days ago, I had pin hole gum surgery. Here is the story thus far.
  Why
   For the last ten years my dentist has been suggesting that I consider gum surgery. My gums were receding at an alarming rate. I have great, healthy teeth and the gums that remained were healthy, they were just retreating up into my nasal passages, leaving the roots exposed. It did not bother me, cosmetically, until my left canine became exposed and black. Gross. The sensitivity was always there, but that's what Sensodyne toothpaste is for. Finally, at my appointment last year, she reacted pretty strongly to how much my teeth had moved. "Our teeth are going to move the older we get,usually they become more of an overbite. This," she indicated my now crooked front tooth "is not due to age." I mentioned that the front left tooth, next to the black rooted canine, could be felt moving. In fact, I could click it around with my tongue. She held her face as stoic dentists do, and said "You should probably look into gum surgery this year."

  What is it?
  I was actively avoiding gum surgery for as long as possible, ten years to be exact: Sensodyne, drinking coffee through a straw, getting a bite guard, etc. The idea of someone scraping the roof of my mouth and stitching it to my gum line was worse than the idea of just having all of my teeth punched out and replaced with implants. My sister in law had that type of gum surgery years ago and watching her go through it has never left my frontal lobe. There was also the cadaver option, grafting someone else's gums to mine. I already have someone else's MCL screwed to my knee, thanks, I'm over my quota. Then there were the synthetic materials. Again, stitching something to my existing gums, but this time it would be something man made. My reluctance was not to the material but to the stitching. I don't want anything stitched to my gums. After my last dental appointment, my moving teeth and the beginning of pain under my nose where my tooth was exposed, I started looking around online for an oral surgeon. My dentist had given me a referral to a periodontist, but they were insanely costly and involved stitching. I had sticker shock when I realized it was going to cost about $1500 A TOOTH, was considered to be "elective" by the insurance company and was $1500 a tooth. "Elective" and "cosmetic" are words the crappy dental coverage uses to tell you they aren't going to pay for it. Why would I think they would? They only cover 50% of a cavity fill. Is that elective? Oh How I Hate Insurance Companies...back to our story.
  I decided it was going to suck and I was going to have to work additional jobs, anyway, so I may as well find a dentist close to home. I google searched Lakewood, and found someone  very near home, Colorado Advanced Dentistry. I knew exactly where they were, a low lying doctor looking building from the 1970's. I got on their website and discovered that Dr. Snitzer does something called "pin hole gum surgery". Not having any idea what that meant, I read through the material on the website. Immediately I was intrigued: no stitching. No attaching something else to my gums at all, in fact. They just pull my gums down and reattach them with collagen. I looked up photos, and while it's not overwhelming, like taking years off of your age or pounds off of your thighs, it was impressive. People with recession worse than mine had their gums pulled back down to a normal looking gum line and they looked great. I held my breath as I looked for the cost. AH, if you have to ask you can't afford it, so I clicked off and tried to forget about it.
   A week later, my tooth was moving daily and I was starting to have slight pain. I reopened the website and called for a free consultation.

  The Dentist
  I met Dr. Snitzer, who by my gauge is 25 years old and too young to be a dentist. She wears false eyelashes and smiles a lot. Her equipment is advanced, her hygienists and office staff are kind and attentive. So is my regular dentist, I think it's a trend. They can't be rude because, unlike medical docs, not everything they do is covered by insurance, they need your business.
   Dr. Snitzer studied this procedure with the guy who invented it. I saw that on the website, but did not see that she also trains other dentists in the procedure. My hygienist told me that once a month she travels to teach this procedure. Wow. She's probably the best in Denver, eh? How'd I luck into that?

   The Cost
   In true medical fashion, nobody breathes a word of the cost until after the free consultation. I am ushered into a small office with a woman who immediately hands me a Care Card application. She tells me most insurance companies will only cover a portion of the surgery, and that the Care Card is your best bet for the remainder of the cost. I don't even know how much this is going to cost yet, but clearly it's going to be a lot. I finally ask. "$12,000 for the upper and lower," she says flatly.
   I apply for and receive the Care Credit card, which has a $9,000 limit. I figure I can work other jobs, Jim's getting a bonus in the fall, we can spread the rest on the other cards. I have all of this in place when it occurs to me the appointment I made was just for the upper. They don't like to do both at once. So I call the week before to get the cost. I am relieved to learn that just the upper will cost $5 grand, and the  insurance would cover $2.To add to the circus, I am on Jim's insurance and his company is changing to a different insurance on 1 August. My surgery is 7 August. The old insurance would cover about $2 thou, the new insurance is an unknown amount. At least I'm only on the hook for the $5 grand, not $12 grand. If I can't get this paid off, I won't get the bottom done. They're not causing me any pain or annoyance, anyway.

  The Surgery
   Since there is no stitching I don't know why they call it surgery. She used teeny tiny instruments to poke pin holes into my gums and pull them down. Once that was done, she anchored them with collagen. Everybody kept acting very casual about this whole thing, and telling me most people go back to work the next day, there is swelling but not pain, blah blah blah. I  got online and found a few posts about the surgery, and discovered that a few people have had some pain, that's it. A few others are disappointed that their gums didn't stay all the way down, that they healed higher than they were placed. Which makes complete sense, and which Dr. Snitzer told me would happen, which is why she over corrects.
   It took longer to numb me than it took to pin hole my gums down. And the numbing was the painful part.
   The whole thing is weird. You're awake. You can hear her scraping away. You can feel the pressure of her tugging on your gums.  The other hygienists all came to observe my surgery. According to the chatter, this was going really well and my gums were fabulous.The collagen has saline and tastes like salt. That's it. The entire thing took and hour and a half.
   The weirdest part is that when she was working on my canines, I thought I was going to sneeze. I did not, she was just working so high up that she was too close to my nasal cavity. I wasn't wrong, my gums were receeding into my nose.
   The rest is on me. Soft foods only for a week, then nothing crunchy or sticky for six weeks. No lifting my lip to show everyone my gums, let them heal. No brushing, eww, but I was gifted this lovely mouth wash. I had an appointment 24 hours after, and have one next week, then three weeks then another three weeks to make sure it's healing. I must use her as my dentist, as untrained hygienists can wreck  the work. I don't want that, thank you, I just paid $5 grand to have this done. I'll be paying this off for the rest of my life. The amount includes all follow ups, etc.
   They took pics on Thursday, and I was aghast. My gum line is really low (it will pop back to something more natural over the next few months) and straight. No exposed roots. Wow.
   Considering the trauma to my gums, they were right about no real pain. Some discomfort and swelling, but I've primarily slept. When I'm awake I take the antibiotic and drink beer. I have to wear the night guard 24/7, unless I'm eating, which causes pressure on that out of place tooth. But in the long run, maybe it'll move back as the gum heals and I won't need invisalign next year.
   I'm no longer Keto, as I have to eat soft foods and I'm not doing a week of mashed cauliflower, sorry. I was sad to let it go--I can't have meat, or broccoli, which have been my staples for a year---but welcomed mashed potatoes back with glee. I've lost three pounds, and I've done nothing but soft carbs and beer. Perhaps I've stumbled on a new diet craze!
   All in all to sum up: Pin Hole Gum Surgery is A Good Thing. It is expensive. Dental insurance sucks. Nothing had to be stitched and nobody scraped the roof of my mouth. Also: beer and mashed potatoes.
   Scene.