Theatre Camp Stories (Two Different Camps)

July/Aug 2017

Today at a theatre camp: It was "goth" day, so everybody was in black. I laughed and said "Looks like a techie convention." A 13 year old girl, a veteran of the camp AND a student at a local "performing arts" school, batted her eyes at me and asked simply "What's a techie?

After I came to, I confirmed that she was not, in fact, kidding. The small circle that had gathered around my unconscious body were all mouthing the same question to one another "What's a 'techie'? Did she say 'techie?'"

I passed out again. This time, upon re entry, I sat in the middle of the circle and explained the word, like Jane Goodall communicating with the chimps. One girl perked up, "Oh, ya, them.Why do we need them?"
With all the snark and fire I could muster, I made eye contact with the ten year old who had spoken and responded, "Because without them you are naked, without makeup, standing in the dark on an empty stage, holding nothing."

Good thing I only have one day left at this camp.

So, last week of theatre camp for me. We're doing combat fairy tales, and a kid says "Let's do Shawshank Redemption, that's my favorite fairy tale."
Me too, kid.

These are late. It's fine. 101 Dalmatians Postcards;

*One of the students "snuck in", as he is only four years old and not old enough for the camp. We will call him Steve. Steve can read and write, which is helpful when rehearsing a show, but he cannot and will not sit still, learn choreography, focus, etc. Instead he crawls under chairs during music rehearsal, insists that it is snack time always, takes my cell phone and returns his score to the producer daily stating "I won't be back". Unfortunately, the next day he comes back. The final time he tried to take my phone I said "Steve, stop. This is my phone, I'm tired of telling you." He slinked back under the chairs and looked up at me and said calmly "I could ruin your life." The SM and Props mistress, who were seated next to me, burst into laughter.

One little girl knew her lines, just not where they went, even after being taught by yours truly what a cue line is. Sometimes she would say the line in the right place, sometimes she wouldn't say it at all, it was a new journey every time. When she finally got her costume, she would not leave her tail alone. Both performances she managed to pull her tail off of her body. What're ya gonna do? As a dalmatian, she was trapped in Cruella's vault, both nights holding her tail aloft in some sort of canine solidarity power pose. On the second night, she was quietly fidgeting with her detached tail, and sometimes remembering her lines, as Cruella said "Bash them over the head, I don't care", and her tail immediately shot straight into the air over her head. She seemed to be demonstrating Cruella's cruelty! Look! She will rip off our tails! Funny, but wrong. But funny. And she said her line, in the wrong place, which was "Shhhhh!". I was not the only adult who had a Norma Rae Flashback, imagining a silent Sally Field holding up her sign UNION.

A girl asked me why I don't get my phone fixed-it has a cracked screen. I said simply "I don't have the money." She replied, just as simply "Why don't you get a lemonade stand?"